Blahsphemy

 How do you tell someone not to do something you have done? How to tell someone to hold on, when you know everything is going to fall apart? How to tell someone that all is not lost when nothing is left? How to tell someone everything without telling anything? 

Adam and Eve never ate the apple. The  apple missed Newton's head. Steve is allergic to apples. What will the world be, if these were true? 

The sonar beeped again. There was something fast approaching. What can it be, wondered the whale, that beeps inside me? 

Looks like I have grown a dick. RIght in my eye. He said.  She choked. What?  Yes, I seem to have grown a penile organ in my eye. And it wants to poke every woman it sees.  You are going nuts. Nope right now it's flaccid. But watch it when a hot chick passes by. Oh my god. You are driving me also nuts. Talking about nuts, I lost one of mine the other day. You are sick. You are horny. You lost your nut. And your eye masturbates. Exactly. Get lost, I have told you a million times not to try those mind altering substances. Looks like I am the one who needs a fix.    

I buried your brother. I found him rotting under the tree last night. I never liked him. I guess he never liked me too. After last night, I hate him more. He could've died somewhere else. Why did I have to bury him? I am sure he must be happy that he made me go through all that trouble last night. I am also happy that I got to bury him. Hope I could bury the hatred as well.

Someone beat me to it. Now I am all alone on this planet. Gazing at the meteor that's speeding towards me and the world I am in. I have exactly one hundred days to flee. But how? Maybe the meteor will lose its steam and die out in space. Maybe it will miss Earth. Maybe I will find and abandoned escape pod. Maybe a miracle will happen. Maybe...    

I'll be late, he said as he stepped out of the house on to the road where he was run over by a truck that wasn't supposed to be there to make him late forever. 

How will you recognize me? When I am lying there all bloody and disjointed in a heap? Will you look for my eyes? Is it your favourite mole that's going to give me away? Will you run away in disgust? Never to claim me or whatever is left of me?     

Life has a strange way of sorting itself out. But in my case I guess it fumbled a bit. Otherwise why should I be here at this end of the computer keying in this story? Well that's life, you might say. 

No one told me anything. I didn't know. I am sorry. One will never think about it that way. My mistake. I should've asked. Hey! Is that me who is lying on that bed? Why are you staring at me like that? I swear, I had no clue about this. Promise. 

I downloaded a dream. It was there on the cloud. Waiting for me. Uploaded by my conscience. I don't know how long the link will last. These days the neural networks are a bit erratic. The administrators are blaming it on the recent LSD attacks. Or was it the Dopamine virus? I have no  clue. Let me enjoy my dream now. Damn my DreamPlayer seems to be outdated. It's been a long time since I have enjoyed a dream. Now where do I get the latest, DreamPlayer?